You could put all the talent I had into your left eye and still not suffer from impaired vision.
-- Veronica Lake

Who's judging American Idol? Paula Abdul? Paula Abdul judging a singing contest is like Christopher Reeve judging a dance contest!

-- Chris Rock (VMA Awards, Aug 2003)

I still believe that at any time the no-talent police will come and arrest me.
-- Mike Myers

I am no more humble than my talents require.
-- Oscar Levant