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| Robert Orben Quotes |
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(b. 1927) - American writer, editor.
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Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any Indian.
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I always wondered why babies spend so much time sucking their thumbs. Then I tasted baby food.
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I got a Valentine's Day card from my girl. It said, 'Take my heart! Take my arms! Take my lips!' Which is just like her. Keeping the best part for herself.
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Love is so confusing - you tell a girl she looks great and what's the first thing you do? Turn out the lights!
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Things are getting so confused out there, they ought to call it the Muddle East.
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A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed in identical caps and gowns that 'individuality' is the key to success.
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Happiness is a very small desk and a very big wastebasket.
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The Playboy calendar this year has some tip-top models. Any more top and they'd tip.
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More than ever before, Americans are suffering from back problems, back taxes, back rent, back auto payments.
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Don't smoke too much, drink too much, eat too much or work too much. We're all on the road to the grave -- but there's no need to be in the passing lane.
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