The only exercise I get is walking behind the coffins of friends who took exercise.
-- Peter OToole

I have a punishing workout regimen. Every day I do 3 minutes on a treadmill, then I lie down, drink a glass of vodka and smoke a cigarette.
-- Anthony Hopkins

I exercise every morning without fail. One eyelid goes up and the other follows.
-- Pete Postlethwaite

Whenever I feel like exercising, I lie down until the feeling passes.
-- Robert Maynard Hutchins

I don't exercise. If God wanted me to bend over, he'd have put diamonds on the floor.
-- Joan Rivers

I don't go to the gym or practice yoga. And the closest thing I have to a nutritionist is the Carlsberg Beer Company. I just have the appetite of a pigeon.
-- Colin Farrell (July 2002, InStyle Magazine)