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Tommy Cooper Quotes Pages: 1   2
(1922 - 1984) - British comedian and magician. Catchphrase - 'Just Like That'
So he said 'I'm going to chop off the bottom of one of your trouser legs and put it in a library.' I thought 'That's a turn-up for the books.'
Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.
I'm on a whisky diet. I've lost three days already!
I slept like a log last night. I woke up in the fireplace.
I had a dream last night, I was eating a ten pound marshmallow. I woke up this morning and the pillow was gone.
You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.' So that was nice.
Cos it's strange, isn't it. You stand in the middle of a library and go 'Aaaaaagghhh!!' and everyone just stares at you. But you do the same thing on an aeroplane, and everyone joins in.
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